Home Run Derby

Olé !!

During the Cubs-Nationals game on Sunday, Aramis Ramirez put on a defensive display which can only be described as Matador-like.  Because he totally got out of the way of a fast approaching bull … ball.

Bottom of the sixth, Nationals trying to extend a two-run lead.  Christian Guzman leads off with a sharp grounder to the third base side. 

Aramis Ramirez gets in front of it … but not for long.

Guzman was credited with a hit on the play, but I’d call it a Fielder’s Choice. 

Because Aramis Ramirez CHOSE to go nowhere near that ball. 

Roger Dorn couldn’t have gotten out of the way of that ball any faster than Ramirez did. 

The Cubs’ TV broadcasters (Len Kasper and Bob Brenly) did their best Harry Doyle impersonation and made it sound like Ramirez had no chance at that ball … unless he wanted a fat lip. 

They put a lot of blame on the hard dirt at Nationals Park – but hadn’t Ramirez just played 23 innings there?  I’m kinda surprised they didn’t say anything about Ramirez’ lack of technique there.

Steve Stone would have.

In your first season of little league,  one of the first things you learn is how to field a ground ball – because half the kids can’t hit one in the air.  

You’re taught to get square your body in front of the ball with your glove down and your other hand above it to help cover the ball and protect your face in case it takes a weird hop. 

Worst case, the ball hits you in the chest and you can still pick it up for the throw.

Now that we’ve identified some characters from Major League on the 2008 Cubs … I want to know who’ll play the role of Jake Taylor and have the following conversation with Aramis Ramirez.

Jake Taylor: What I was concerned with was why you didn’t come up with that grounder that Rockert hit in the 9th
Roger Dorn: It was out of my reach, what do you want me to do dive for it?
Jake Taylor: Rog, it could have meant the game!
Roger Dorn: oh come on cut the rah rah shit Taylor! Year after this I go free agent. Plus me and my agent got a couple of plans for life after baseball. So I am not about to risk major injury or displace this property for a collection of stiffs!
Jake Taylor: Ya know Dorn, I liked you so much better when you were just a ballplayer. If you wanna be an interior decorator cockfighter – now that’s none of my business.

But some of us still need this team. Now you listen to me! This is my last shot at a winner and for some of the younger guys it could be their only shot. I don’t know what happened to you. But if you ever, ever tank another play like you did today, I’m gonna cut your nuts off and stuff em down your f*ckin throat!

Which Cub has the stones to do it?

Maybe Cubs Manager Lou Piniella should just channel his inner Lou Brown and tell Ramirez to get in front of the damn ball and cut this “olé bullshit.”

We’re big fans of the movie Major League here at Home Run Derby.  Especially Bob Uecker’s portrayal of world-weary Cleveland radio broadcaster Harry Doyle …

So when someone dubs Doyle’s call of the final out of the ninth inning of the tiebreaker playoff game from the movie (between the Yankees and the Indians) over the final out of the series-clinching ninth inning in Game 4 of the 2007 ALDS (between the Yankees and the Indians) … well, we’re gonna post it.

Here’s video of the dub …

(more…)

As the resident acolyte of the Church of El Guapo, I offer the above quote as the alpha and omega of justification for Guapo love. 

But like El Guapo himself, there’s more to love from this Boston magazine profile on the comeback of the century, such as:

 - El Guapo chasing down a fly ball to the outfield during BP (picture the Death Star closing in on the Millenium Falcon)

 - El Guapo fudging the speed of his heater to Sports Illustrated

 - The involvement of, who else, a Maddux in creating the legend of the Guapo

 - The mysterious and terrifying concession stand sandwich that carries his name

 - “I like cervezas”

 Vaya con Dios, El Guapo.

(Hat tip to Deadspin- also a worshipper at the altar of Guapo)

One of the best things about the movie Major League was Bob Uecker’s role as Harry Doyle, the world-weary and sarcastic radio announcer for the Cleveland Indians.

Some of Harry’s quotes from the movie have become part of baseball’s lexicon…

Juuust a bit outside …

Don’t worry, nobody is listening anyway.

Personally, I think we got hosed on that call.

Well, the PA announcer for the minor league Reno Silver Sox played that last one after a close call at first base the other night.

So the umpires threw him out of the park and shut down the Public Address system. His follow-up punishment (handed down by the Golden Baseball League) was to be the 3rd base umpire for an inning at a game on Friday June 8th.

Dave Stewart was right. Umpires are getting too full of themselves.

Even in the minor leagues.