Home Run Derby

There’s lots of reasons to go to a Major League Baseball game …

But sometimes, that’s just not enough to make you pay $40 for a ticket and drink a beer for $7, especially if the team sucks … and MLB Teams know it.  So they offer trinkets and bawbles to get your butt in a seat.  Yep, we’re talking promotions and giveaways.  And we usually fall for it.

The majority of these handouts are overdone retreads of stuff like t-shirts and floppy hats and plastic doodads like keychains and flashlights and bobbleheads.  Bobbleheads are great, but unless you’re the table in front of Mike and Mike or Mottram and Steinz, how many do you need?

But sometimes, the team’s marketing squad does something creative … here are the best ones you can try to grab in 2008.

Joe Mauer Fishing Lure - Minnesota Twins (May 2)

Now this is cool.  In a state with 10,000 lakes, you’re gonna need something to catch bass with when the Twins are on the road.   

Mind you, I’m not sure how many times an MLB team has given away anything with six sharpened barbs on it before.  This could be a one-and-done event, because you just know someone’s gonna lose an eye from this thing.  Given out to the first 5,000 fans over the age of 18.

No boys, this will not help you catch anything like Mauer’s ex-girlfriend, former Miss USA Chelsea Cooley.  No girls, this will not help you catch Joe Mauer.

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Crazy Crab clawed Dinger into extinction, so it’s time for another First Round matchup. 

We head to the Primate Division, where Baseball’s resident zymurgist takes on some guys who are probably in your wallet.  Your vote will decide who moves on to face the Swinging Friar.

#3 Bernie Brewer (Milwaukee) vs #6 The Racing Presidents (Washington)

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Fans looking for Seattle Mariners bobbleheads have been given an early National Beheading Day present (it comes every September 2nd, get to know your obscure holidays, people).

To capitalize on the most fascinating of giveaways, the Mariners have made one ginormous life-sized bobblehead in the likeness of each of their four most popular players. Ichiro, Raul Ibanez, Felix Hernandez, and Kenji Johjima are the men featured in this auction of near replicas.

Each of these massive collectibles measures 6 feet in height, but more impressive is the striking resemblance each of these bobbleheads has … to the other three life-sized dolls.

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