Home Run Derby

Barry Bonds told everyone in the world yesterday that he’s a big f*cking coward. 

Okay, maybe not in those exact words, but he left no doubt about it.

Who could Bonds be afraid of?  What names strike fear into the heart of a man who is only five Home Runs away from breaking Baseball’s all-time Home Run Record? 

Let’s run down the list of suspects who could cause Bonds to soil his little panties …

Senator George Mitchell ? 

The former US Senator and the Grand Inquisitor of Major League Baseball’s futile attempt to find out what exactly happened during Baseball’s Steroid Era?

No.  The Mitchell probe is useless because players aren’t required to talk.  And Giambi is only going to talk about his own involvement.

Bud Selig ? 

The Baseball Commissioner who seems to want nothing to do with Bonds breaking the record of his boyhood hero Hank Aaron? 

No.  Bonds has dodged the wrath of the former used car salesman Commissioner so far and will probably just continue to do so.

Lance Williams and Mark Fainaru-Wada ?

The San Francisco Chronicle reporters and Game of Shadows authors who were willing to spend time in jail to protect their story and their sources about Bonds and BALCO?

No.  Bonds has endured a cloud of doubt and suspicion from Game of Shadows, but the book has done little to stop Bonds on or off the field.

Greg Anderson ? 

Bonds’ personal trainer, confidante, and alleged link to BALCO who’s rotting in prison as a result of refusing to testify in the Grand Jury hearings against big-headed buddy?

No.  Anderson has been Bonds friend since middle school and it looks like he’s willing to go the distance to protect his frind and meal-ticket.

Kirk Radomski ? 

The former NY Mets clubhouse guy who’s supposedly naming some big names in baseball to whom he allegedly provided steroids and Human Growth Hormone over the past ten years?

Probably not, because Bonds use of steroids could seen as vindication (in his eyes) if a bunch of high-profile baseball users were to come out - even though he’d still always deny being one of them.

Kimberly Bell ? 

Bonds’ man-handed former mistress who’s writing a tell all book and reportedly about to show some skin to help hype the book? 

Nah.  She’s not going to say anything that hasn’t been speculated already.  Besides … no one reads the articles anyway.

So why is Barry afraid of participating in the 2007 Home Run Derby and get an extra night of batting practice in front of the San Francisco fans who found a way to get him into the All-Star Game?

“Nope,” Bonds said Thursday when asked about the Derby. “Especially when you’re 42. It’s not that you don’t want to, it’s that you just can’t anymore. You can’t. It’s too long. Too much waiting. Too much sitting around. You can’t do that.”

It defies all logic.  I would think participating in the Home Run Derby in his home stadium would be a given for Bonds.  Why is Bonds not participating in a Home Run Derby which will be held at AT&T Park in San Fran, which is …

• A park where he’s hit more Home Runs (155) than anyone else
• A park where he hits a Home Run once every three games (465 games played) 
• A park where he’s hit 34 “splash hits” into McCovey Cove
• A park whose pathetic excuse for a right field line (309 feet at the most) was built expressly so he could chase the all-time Home Run record held by Hank Aaron

Why?  More like Who.  Namely …

Ryan Howard and Prince Fielder

Because these two young, portly, lefthanded sluggers have decided to participate in the Home Run Derby in San Francisco.  And Bonds knows that he can’t compete with these two phenoms. 

Howard is the reigning Home Run Derby Champion and hit 58 Home Runs in 2006 with 20 so far this year.  Fielder has been the hottest slugger in the National League this year with 27 Home Runs after hitting 28 last season.  And they’re going to make a run at making more “splash hits“ into McCovey Cove in one night than Bonds has in his career.

Bonds doesn’t want to get upstaged.  Plus, he doesn’t get a bonus from the Giants if he makes the Home Run Derby like the $100,000 he gets for making the All-Star Game. 

Home Run hitters should play in the Home Run Derby.  That includes you, Barry. 

This entry was posted on Friday, July 6th, 2007 at 4:28 pm and is filed under 2007 MLB, MLB Home Run Derby, Steroids. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.