Mark Buehrle has a Big Ass Truck
Posted by: Richie Rich in Cubs, Phillies, Pitching, White Sox
About a year ago, Jon Lieber’s truck was the talk of the Phillies’ Spring Training.
It wasn’t just a pickup truck. It was a ginormous beast that most people thought could have turned into Optimus Prime in its spare time.
Let’s remember … it was a tricked-out Ford F-650 SuperTruck with six doors, 45-inch wheels, a customized leather interior with seating for seven. It held 200 gallons of gas (four 50-gallon tanks) and had a fricking satellite dish. It set Lieber back $211,000.
Well, Chicago White Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle, fresh off his camouflage jersey victory will roll into Arizona with a ride that might hold up well against Lieber’s wheels.
Behold … Mark Buehrle’s Canyonero.
Okay, It’s actually a 2007 Ford F-650 Dominator.
This titan is ten feet tall and weighs more than six tons. You need something akin to a commercial drivers license to thunder this monster on a road.
The Southpaw added four-wheel drive and some hydraulics that lower the bed to the ground. He didn’t say how much it exactly cost him, only divulging that it was in the six-
When he first saw it, he was stunned by it too …
“Oh [bleep], that thing’s a lot bigger than I expected.”
But don’t expect to see Buehrle riding it too much in Chicago.
“It’s a hunting truck, so it’s going to be dirty and messy.”
The F-650 Super Truck is popular among other athletes too. Chris McCallister and Shaquille O’Neal also own this behemoth.
“Twelve yards long, two lanes wide, sixty-five tonnes of American pride: Canyero! Canyonero!”
Entries (RSS)
February 12th, 2008 at 4:53 am
Compensating Much, Mark?
February 12th, 2008 at 11:09 am
yet another reason to believe how stupid pro athletes are.
jeeze, and people in this country are starving and homeless.
February 12th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
Yeah, people may be starving, but…. damn why you gotta be such a downer?
February 12th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
Wow, comment #2 takes the lead for “Dumbest Comment Of The Year.”
Seriously, it’s going to be hard to top that one.
February 12th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
That is a crazy truck……Hey, if MLB owners are willing to pay baseball players as much as they do, then more power to him! And it’s his money, he can spend it on whatever he wants!
To the guy complaining about poor people starving in China or whatever: get real. I’m sure you buy lots of crap with your Mcdonald’s paycheck.
February 13th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
To comment #2 – You are an azzbag. Their intelligence level and choice in trucks are mutually exclusive. I know it sucks to have to cram into your sh1tbox and drive to your barista job at Starbucks, but if you had a fastball, you’d be living the dream as well. Although my guess it your dream includes gay porn and tree hugging. Choke on sh1t hippy.
One love.
February 13th, 2008 at 8:59 pm
I always knew that pro athletes must have ginormous vehicles that normal humans aren’t allowed to have. Now I have proof.
February 20th, 2008 at 10:56 am
Wow, I stand corrected. comment #6 takes the lead for “Dumbest Comment Of The Year.
”
Seriously, it’s going to be hard to top that one. Who would get so worked up over a comment in a baseball thread? Insecure much? The gay porn comment pretty much somes you up.
February 20th, 2008 at 10:58 am
Wow he doesn’t like big trucks so you come to the brilliant conclusion that he must then like gay porn? What logic!
February 21st, 2008 at 11:44 pm
We are the ones that pay them anyway. For our entertainment we pay to watch them either on tv or live.
We the people buy team logo, jersey, and etc.
So if you do not want these athletes making a whole lot of money stop supporting them and watching sports. duh
February 23rd, 2008 at 7:06 pm
LOL, good stuff ! Love reading your blogs.
March 17th, 2008 at 10:42 am
[...] one of the distinct disadvantages is parking. As such, I have no earthly idea where Mark Buehrle plans to park his Ford F-650 Dominator (pictured above) when the White Sox come back up north. I mean, I have trouble finding a spot [...]
June 28th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
[...] Effects – Mark Buerhle’s truck. The way they make it seem so ridiculously large is truly a stunning application of perspective and… wait, it’s really that big? Holy [...]
February 24th, 2009 at 9:29 am
#8: “somes you up?”
It’s particularly entertaining when someone misspells a 3 letter word.
hah!
anyway, yeah i think the gay porn thing was a joke. i chuckled, but i guess i can be “somed up” as an idiot
anyway– yeah it’s a ridiculous truck but think about how many people who have jobs because Buerhle has an inferiority complex: auto workers, leather crafters, gas station attendants, gay porn actors… you know– the economy! jobs jobs jobs
March 25th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
The good news is that a lot of people were put to work making this penis mobile. The bad news is when wakes up one day and realizes what a dick he is.
May 21st, 2009 at 8:49 am
There is absolutely NO reason anyone should have a vehicle like this!!!!!!
It’s sooo stupid, I don’t even know what to say.
What’s the reason? There is NO REASON.
May 21st, 2009 at 1:18 pm
So what youre saying is that youre hunge like Stewie Griffin?
As for that hunting shit, id be more impressed if it was hand to hand combat:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7XwmI9SSOc
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:01 pm
[...] He’s a traditional Missourian and owns a massive, massive pick-up truck. (Home Run Derby) [...]
August 1st, 2009 at 5:02 pm
comment shut the f and get some big truck experience in your life hell i drive a ford f150 4×4 truck with a 14 inch lift and dual exaust so shut the f up
March 19th, 2010 at 12:20 pm
Huh, I hope I understand this the way it was meant..